I think I’m gonna start volunteering at an animal shelter again. It’s something I loved doing before I got too sick to. I don’t feel well enough to walk them too much I don’t think, but I love to just sit with them and cuddle. I think that helps them just as much if not more. They start to become less afraid of humans, and they are MUCH more likely to be adopted. And I can do it in a caftan…
I’m tired of being fat. And don’t get me wrong. I don’t think there is anything wrong with being fat. But I am fat because I’m sick. I wasn’t even that big until I accidentally moved into a moldy apartment. I gained about 12 pounds A MONTH while we lived there. We lived there for six months and I gained about eighty pounds. I’m so tired of looking in the mirror and seeing a pale, swollen,green-eyed, fat, scarred person with rashes. I want to to see my self. I want to see my naturally average sized, normal colored, smooth, bright, even-toned, blue-eyed, self. I want to not have to feel my illness but also have to see it. I want my cute healthy self back. If I was really a curvy girl I think I could rock it like nobody’s business. But I don’t identify as a curvy girl, partially because it came on so damn fast I guess.
shoutout to young adults with debilitating conditions who feel like their lives are stagnant or regressing, while everyone else moves forward
we’re gonna be ok
SHOUT OUT TO ALL MY DISABLED FATTIES WHO HAVE PEOPLE ASSUMING YOU’RE JUST A LAZY PIECE OF SHIT WHEN YOU TAKE THE ELEVATOR OR A SEAT ON THE BUS WHO NOT ONLY HAVE TO PUT UP WITH THE CHRONIC PAIN THAT COMES WITH A LOT OF ILLNESSES BUT PEOPLE MAKING A MOCKERY OF YOU WHEN YOU GO OUT AND TRY AND DO YOUR THING.
I LOVE YALL
I’m really trying (and finally being able to) focus on being excited about when I am going to be well instead of being really upset that I’m still sick and that progress is so slow.
If you’ve seen my polyvore you know I’m gonna be hella cute when I can finally wear the clothes I want.